What the Avocado?

Mayonnaise or mayonaise. However you spell it. Love it or hate it. I gotta' have it.


It's a "personal taste" kind of thing I suppose. I remember eating mayonnaise and tomato sandwiches for a snack in my youth. But after living life and doing this whole "adult responsibility" adventure, I wonder was it a snack or because we had little else to eat?


We seemed to always have plenty of food or something yummy growing outside but honestly, I took country living for granted. Running around barefoot, picking plums off trees in our yard to eat and never locking our doors. It was the best of times. But what kid really thinks about where their food is coming from? Nowadays, they have their faces buried in cell phones instead of burying seeds in the ground. But whose fault is that? It's certaintly not theirs. Anyhoo...

When I became a pescatarian in 2005, I didn't consider what ingredients might be in my favorite condiments. But after reading some of the labels, I knew I could no longer eat them. Depending on what you're attempting to give up, most processed condiments have meat products hiding in them.

I make my own ketchup, cheese and mayonnaise. I have several varieties I experiment with including spicy, mainly using avocados. I think you will enjoy the quick and easy recipe below. Don't toss the seed it has high nutritional value. I grind it and add it to many dishes. Adjust the spices or replace these ingredients with your own, especially if you don't like avocado. But who doesn't like avocado?

Gee wiz...

Your bloody kitchen poet poem and recipe are below. Happy New Year souls but it's in the spring actually... But okay kay... 

"Avocado Blue"  Some say the many stars

gleaming way up high are bright

Others bemoan darkness of night There are some

who swear Morocco 

is eight thousands miles from Rome

while other cultured souls eat with their fingers alone

Debating the color of love

then swear that you must be green 

But I propose

this improbable notion is untruth

Because you enchant me

sliding past my lips

like a doctored brew

Enchanting me

Like southern guitars in smoky rooms

leaving me avocado blue

 © Soul aka The Kitchen Poet 2019 

PREP TIME 10 mins (Raw dish | Should last approximately 4 to 5 days) Keep refrigerated. This recipe yielded about one 16 oz jar. 

Double for larger quantities aight?

INGREDIENTS One ripe avocado 1/2 tsp apple cider vinegar 1/8 tsp fresh lemon

1/8 tsp lemon zest 1/4 tsp onion powder 1/2 tsp garlic powder

A pinch of ginger

1/8 tsp agave or Grade B maple syrup 1/8 tsp sea salt

1/8 tsp nutritional yeast (If available) 1/3 cup water 1/8 tsp coconut oil or water  Blend all ingredients until creamy smooth. If it's too thick add water or coconut milk until desired consistency. You can spice it up by adding cayenne pepper when blending. You can leave out the ginger or use less. I just happen to like ginger in everything.  Soul aka The Kitchen Poet

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